The butterflies escaped.
I was out shopping earlier today with a friend from work and began to notice the strangest, strongest sense of nervousness going on in my stomach. It drove me crazy for a couple of hours and for a little while there I felt like I might actually expel the contents of my stomach into the air. I swear I could have swallowed a hundred desperate, invisible butterflies as I yawned (or something) in that store!! The feeling remained after I returned home, albeit lessened.
Then I decided to look up the movies for next week, since Lord Of The Rings: Return of the King is supposed to be coming out on December 17th (next Wednesday). It wasn't listed. Gotta love living where things are slow. A familiar title caught my eye and reminded me of a conversation I'd had a couple of weeks ago. Suddenly my stomach did another 180 and almost knocked me off my chair. The feeling increased as I made a decision, one that I had been avoiding for about two weeks.
I made a phone call.
Surprisingly, the butterflies appear to have escaped. My body is calm, tranquil, even at peace. Granted, my leg is jumping up and down uncontrollably beneath my desk, but that's not highly unusual for me these days. At least my stomach has settled down to a happy crawl.
Whoa, wait. No, but alas... another emotion... what is this? YIPES!! Not complete and utter nervousness accompanied by butterflies, but... yes, I do believe it's anticipation. By golly, yes, that's exactly what it is! Also, a slight twinge of regret over having made the phone call, wishing I'd given things more time, but... regret isn't worth keeping around very long. Everything happens for a reason. Either my action was better than inaction at this point for progressive reasons, or to end a sense of waiting I believe remained in my being, or perhaps even to teach me not to make such calls by offering me real experience so I know exactly why. Whatever the reason, I'll accept it when it makes itself known to me.
In the meantime, I'll focus on work and my computers and my little gerbils, and enjoy this newfound anticipation.
Feeling both techie and disturbingly bubbly,
~nvnohi
Then I decided to look up the movies for next week, since Lord Of The Rings: Return of the King is supposed to be coming out on December 17th (next Wednesday). It wasn't listed. Gotta love living where things are slow. A familiar title caught my eye and reminded me of a conversation I'd had a couple of weeks ago. Suddenly my stomach did another 180 and almost knocked me off my chair. The feeling increased as I made a decision, one that I had been avoiding for about two weeks.
I made a phone call.
Surprisingly, the butterflies appear to have escaped. My body is calm, tranquil, even at peace. Granted, my leg is jumping up and down uncontrollably beneath my desk, but that's not highly unusual for me these days. At least my stomach has settled down to a happy crawl.
Whoa, wait. No, but alas... another emotion... what is this? YIPES!! Not complete and utter nervousness accompanied by butterflies, but... yes, I do believe it's anticipation. By golly, yes, that's exactly what it is! Also, a slight twinge of regret over having made the phone call, wishing I'd given things more time, but... regret isn't worth keeping around very long. Everything happens for a reason. Either my action was better than inaction at this point for progressive reasons, or to end a sense of waiting I believe remained in my being, or perhaps even to teach me not to make such calls by offering me real experience so I know exactly why. Whatever the reason, I'll accept it when it makes itself known to me.
In the meantime, I'll focus on work and my computers and my little gerbils, and enjoy this newfound anticipation.
Feeling both techie and disturbingly bubbly,
~nvnohi
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